Monday, June 18, 2012

Here I Go Again...

Hello all you TMG-ers!  I am here at the table watching my Cub play with Mack (from Cars : ) instead of eating his breakfast!  I hope you all had an amazing Daddy's Day with your guys.  We just hung out since daddyguy had to work last night and we are visiting Papa (my dad) today!

So, here I am, an out of work teacher.  There are a lot of us around nowadays.  Searching for a teaching job is no fun, let me tell you!  Luckily 80% of my experience has been in a private, religious school & those are the only ones hiring.  The stress of needing a job and not having one weighs heavily on me these days, let me tell you!  I am in essence starting over.  At this point, I'm looking for a teaching position but searching for more untraditional things too, possibly starting a little business.  We will see!

How does this relate to TMG and being a mama?  Well, it has everything to do with it!  I know I'm not the only one out there...and the stress of another person counting on you is astronomical.  The deep-seated desire and pull to give and do everything for you child mixed with the lack of funds is pretty frustrating.  I'm used to doing whatever I wanted with my to a craft store and start a project?  Sure!  You want that new Cars car?  Ok!  These are not things I can do at the moment.  (Ok, I admit, I have started a few things for Cub's big boy room..)

Is it life and death?  No, not at this point (let's ask that again in August if I don't have anything lined up...)  but it is life changing.  The little extras have given way to "gotta save save save!" and this is ok.  Just stressful.  It also calls into question things like my self worth, who I am and other more complicated things that I don't think people realize.

Time to go for a run (if it isn't too hot already) and then take Cub to the pool---all while leaving my phone so I can't obsessively check my email for interview offers!!!

<3 Jen

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